6 Soul-Level Reasons We Are So Attracted To Some People

Do you know the feeling of meeting someone for the first time yet feeling like you have already known them for ten years?

Or have you ever felt irrationally, strongly attracted to someone? This attraction might manifest as (or be confused with) romantic or sexual attraction, but at the same time you know it runs way deeper than that. It’s like there is something in your core and soul that irresistibly pushes you to connect with that person.

Or maybe you just feel that you resonate with someone at a very deep, mysterious level, without being able to explain it at all.

A whole bunch of soul-level circumstances can cause this kind of resonance between you and other people. Here are a few common ones.

Soul-Level Agreements

At soul-level you have agreements with other souls to do spiritual development work together in this lifetime. These agreements can be decided upon after or even before you are born.

We usually have hundreds of these agreements. Depending on the choices we make, we meet some of these souls, and others not.

So it’s not like we necessarily meet those people. But when we do meet them, we immediately have this sense of deep recognition. It’s like you had an appointment with them and they just showed up for that appointment. You just know this is something big, something meaningful, something that happens at a deeper level. It’s like, wow.

This does not necessarily mean that you should marry that person, though. In some cases it is specified that the work together will happen within the frame of a romantic relationship – though not necessarily long-term. Some short-term relationships can also be very beneficial and growth generating.

Other times the nature of the relationship is undefined, so it could be a romantic relationship, but also a friendship, a business partnership, a teacher-student relationship… Whatever best serves your growth at that time.

Past Lives

With some people, we feel like we already know them… because we actually already know them!

You might have met them in one or several past lives. They might have been your sister, father, best friend, lover, or teacher in a past life. Maybe you two were married for ten lifetimes. ;)

Then of course you recognize them. They feel familiar, like you’ve known them for a long time. Meeting them is not like meeting someone new, it’s more like finding a good old friend again.

When we meet good, old friends again after a long absence, we feel like hugging them and spending time with them. That’s only natural isn’t it.

Soul Affinity

There are souls that you have never met in any past life before and have no agreement with, but they feel familiar or rather strangely similar to you. That’s the case when you guys belong to the same soul group (basically, the place your soul comes from – this place greatly shapes your soul), or have the same energetic strengths and soul-level talents.

That’s a bit like recognizing someone who comes from the same city or does the same job as you. You feel drawn to them because you just feel that you have something in common. This can be pretty intense, especially if you feel you haven’t really found your spiritual tribe prior to meeting them.

Vibrational Match

We are usually attracted to people based on the energy they radiate.

When they have a similar energetic vibe as we have, they feel familiar and comfortable to us. We probably aren’t crazily attracted to them then, but we like to be around them.

When their vibe is a match for the kind of energy we would like to have more of, then we feel strongly attracted to them. By being in their presence, we can adjust to their energy, and this allows us to learn, grow, change, manifest new results in our life, and shift our own vibration.

Soul-Level Gifts

Consciously or unconsciously, we always strive to express our soul-level gifts and talents in our human existence. Doing this all alone sitting in a cave doesn’t lead to much growth or choice, so we usually express our gifts by interacting with other people. Some people more than others allow us to fully express our gifts and step into who we are at soul-level. We feel tremendously attracted to these people.

For example healers will tend to feel irresistibly attracted to all kinds of wounded birds and unhappy or struggling persons. I know that from my own experience. When I see someone who has this vibe of pain about them, I just cannot help it, I feel like walking up to them and hugging them. It’s my nature.

Teachers will be drawn to students who are ready to hear their teaching, and so on.

Living our soul purpose means expressing our gifts and doing what we came here to do. We intuitively feel it when someone will give us the opportunity to do just that. Then we strongly want to interact with them!

When this is the case with someone, you need to be aware of what’s going on. Which also means that you need to be aware of your soul-level gifts and purpose. When it wasn’t clear to me yet that I was a healer, I would mistakenly get involved with people who would be better served being my clients, because I was feeling so drawn to them that I thought I must have a crush on them or something. This kind of attraction just didn’t make any sense to me back then.

Unhealthy Energetic Connections

There is a whole bunch of different connections between two souls that can cause us to feel very attracted to the other person, but that are inappropriate and not doing you any good. That’s the kind of stuff I clear away in my sessions.

These connections keep you energetically bound to the other person, whether you want it or not. Sometimes it manifests as you feeling preoccupied with them or worried about them or just thinking about them a lot or wanting to spend time with them. You might feel annoyed or drained by them, but you won’t necessarily always feel bad about them. It can even look like being in love with them.

Sometimes this kind of connection causes negative energies to circulate in you, negatively affecting your whole life and your other relationships, without you even linking this to the relationship it originated from.

This kind of inappropriate energetic bonds can create very strong feelings of belonging, recognition or attraction in you. These don’t come from a healthy place though, and the resulting relationships usually are quite draining.

So you think you feel attracted?

I’m going to be a wet blanket now.

Feeling drawn to someone in this very special, deeper way doesn’t mean that much.

It can feel wonderful and be a beautiful thing. It can also be caused by stuff that’s far from being beautiful.

Even when it is a truly beautiful thing, there are hundreds and thousands of people you can have this kind of beautiful connection with.

When our mind doesn’t have any other explanation in its frame of reference, it easily confuses this special something with romantic feelings. I warn against over-romanticizing. There are many reasons you could be feeling what you are feeling. Very often, a romantic relationship is not the most appropriate expression of it.

All this being said, do trust your gut when you have these feelings. They ARE meaningful and point to something, even if this something isn’t as positive or spectacular as we would wish.

It feels great to meet someone and just know you are called to connect with them. Just like I feel called to connect with you. :)

I’d love to hear your comments!

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42 Responses to 6 Soul-Level Reasons We Are So Attracted To Some People

  • Crystal says:

    Great article! You hit the nail on the head! There are so many reasons you are attracted to individuals at Soul-level and every one of them has a reason and meaning behind them. The relationships don’t always work out, but in the end the growth that comes from connecting with another on such a deep level is absolutely beautiful.

    I am a healer Soul and from finding this out, it’s also helped me to stop and ask myself why I want to run and help another. It certainly doesn’t make the connections any less beautiful, in fact – they now mean more!

    • Thank you Crystal. :)

      I can relate. Sometimes I see someone, and there is *something* in them, some pain, some suffering, that makes me soooo want to run to them and hug them! Now at least I know it’s my calling to live my purpose, not a sudden crush. ;)



    • Isy says:

      I’ve been wondering about this for some time and had to take some time and reflect and eventually wrote a poem about this feeling of attraction:


      Mirrored dancers
      following lines of love
      Drawn in ethereal time.

      Man and woman?
      Beyond that.

      Two souls; undressed of gender.
      I would meet you in the dance.

      Timeless moment; still
      My old heart beats.

      Blood pumping through us,
      We have no choice
      But to comply and fly;

      Circling and wheeling each other
      In vast eternities of the sky.

      I searched online for something on this and found your article and it really expresses what I’ve been going through with a colleague at work who I know I’m not attracted to but feel very linked too. There’s this odd other level to it that makes me feel out of my depth. I’m married, with children and he’s gay so it’s not like that sort of relationship.
      It’s more an intense working relationship: we’re both teachers and he’s recently applied for promotion within the team. I feel like he draws me back into the workplace and into teaching however much I resist or take time out. Any thoughts on this?

      • Hi Isy,

        Your poem is very beautiful. :)

        It frequently happens to me that I feel strongly attracted to some people (both men and women) without it being any sexual or romantic attraction. Usually this happens when I feel in my core that these people can teach or show me something important on my path. It is beyond rational. :)

        Just like that without having access to your soul-level information I can’t tell what it is for you and your colleague in this case. It sounds like it is something about your work. What is it in your work that you resist or want to take a break from? Why is that? What is he there to show or teach you or trigger in you? Do you feel aligned with your purpose in your work? And so on. :)



        • Isy says:

          thanks for your reply, Rosine. I’ve had a few career breaks with teaching and am due to have another break as I am expecting my second child in the next few weeks.
          Maybe my colleague represents the more creative/intuitive side of teaching that I know I will miss when I am doing all the day to day childcare/ housework tasks etc on my maternity leave. He also helps my professional confidence and is a very positive person in general so maybe it is an extension and expression of that. I can be a bit self critical and he seems to make that lack of belief go away somehow. I’m really intrigued by these creative friendships and kindred souls and I wonder what higher purpose they serve.

          • Congratulations on your new baby. :)

            What strikes me is what you said about being a bit self-critical and your colleague making this go away. That’s something I would explore further if I were you.

            I believe the higher purpose of these soul-level connections is that we help each other grow. It’s like we are all playing a big game and we help each other out in the game. At least that’s how I see it. :)



  • Happy Carrot says:

    Very interesting! I can already see how many times I was mistaken with my romantic feelings. And it’s especially hard to recognize what kind of attraction it is if it concerns another gender…..

    • Hello Happy Carrot, :)

      What a cool name!

      These feelings might not be “mistaken” (after all, why not express this in a sexual or romantic way?) but we humans are so fond of romance that we might read more into them than really is. :)



  • Brandi says:

    **Giggle** Oh my goodness hehe I was just pondering this!! Rosine, I always seem to be wondering about exactly what you post…the very same day it’s posted! lol Concerning soul attraction, one of my ponderings was- do socioeconomic disparities prevent one having a successful relationship with their romantic soul mate/soul partner? It seems to me that we all have more than one soul mate/partner. Do we make soul mate/partner agreements for different soul evolution stages, just in case we evolve slower or faster than intended? For example, as for socioeconomic disparities, It seems that if one is filthy rich and one of their soul mates is dirt poor, could they still connect and have an amazing relationship? I know these types of relationships are popular in movies, like “Pretty Woman” but on the soul-level, I wonder if socioeconomic differences matter when determining if one connects with their soul mate/partner or not.

    • Hi Brandi,

      What interesting questions! :)

      I think too big socioeconomic disparities are a hindrance indeed. There are many, many reasons someone can be rich or poor, including self-esteem, self-confidence at work, alignment with abundance or power, the state of the second chakra (which also influences sexuality), negative stuff present in their energy bodies… Our life (and wallet) isn’t random, it reflects our energetic state of being. Different socioeconomic situations mean different energetic states. You need to be a bit similar energetically to attract each other. A bit different is okay I think, but when two persons are tooo different in these areas, they just don’t resonate with each other. They might not even be able to meet, and if they meet, there would be so much dissonance that a successful relationship would be very unrealistic.

      Based on what I have found in my clients’ records, yes we have many possible soul mates/partners. Depending on our choices, we meet some of them and others not. Sometimes we don’t evolve as planned and don’t meet some of them, or cannot maintain relationships with them. Happens. But even if socioeconomic disparities prevent us from meeting some of them, we can still meet others who are energetically closer to us, so it’s no biggie. :)



  • Spirit69 says:

    Liebe Rosine,

    jetzt da ich deinen Artikel noch einmal gelesen habe, möchte ich dir auf diesem Weg für deine Hilfe im letzten Jahr danken.

    Frei zu sein von diesen ungewollten und ungesunden Verbindungen ist das Beste, was mir auf meinem Weg passieren konnte… Ich bin dir zutiefst verbunden dafür!!!

    Danke, daß du bei uns bist!

  • c says:

    Would be nice to see what you would have to say about the fact that some of us are attracted to particular nationalities as a mate but don’t care about the nationalities of our friends. I am attracted and prefer to go out with particular guys of a certain nationality and I am not drawn to other nationalities at all in general, can’t help it my body does the work and soul searching and I can feel that. When looking at my friends they come from all over with many differences, when I look for a mate I find I like meeting someone quite similar to myself I notice I am happier if he likes the same kind of nationalities as I do as a mate. Also, it angers me when there are some people who are ignorant about this and look at it as a bad thing if you like a particular type of man, when you force someone to like someone they are not particularly drawn to of a certain nationality you are hurting the person by not letting them be themselves. I know many people who like certain nationaliites only and some like all, and then there are others who only like one type, etc… etc… be interesting to see what you gather in terms of the soul.

    • Hi C,

      This is difficult for me to answer. The vast majority of my clients come from the Western World (US, Canada, Australia, Western Europe…) and India. I have almost nobody from Africa, Asia or the Middle East, for example. Aside from a few exceptions I also tend to attract only a few, specific soul groups. So this does not allow me to draw too many empiric conclusions about soul-level attraction as related to nationalities!

      As far as I could see, soul groups, soul-level agreements and attraction at soul-level are independent from nationalities.

  • Pretty Pisces says:

    I am a practicing astrologer specializing in RELATIONSHIPS ~ in 2 ways we can see how people & their “energies” interact either in a health or unhealthy way.

    Synastry Charts= chemistry(comparing aspects between 2 individuals)

    & Composite charts = alchemy (blending the 2 charts together into a single chart).

    What I have DISCOVERED is that people come together to learn IMPORTANT life lessons, HEAL, & rectify OLD debts due to KARAM ~ time after time whether friends, family or lovers~ there is ALWAYS a reason.

    I have been doing INDEPENDENT research for a few years. Even though I have been studying astrology for at least 20 years!! Only recently I’ve been writing down what I’ve discovered.

    ALL in ALL there are actually many positive/easy as well as hard/difficult aspects between 2 people particularly in LOVE. There is ALWAYS a reason why they were ATTRACTED to begin with…the MYSTERY is WHY the relationships often dont last eventhough they are clearly soul mates. Perhaps this just PROVES that we have MORE than *one* soul mate during our lifetime.

    Some relationships are more KARMIC::meaning there are LESSONS to be learned from the OTHEr & vice versa. Once we understand WHY we came togethe rin the FIRST place, it is easier to ACCEPT why we also must part ways as PAINFUL as it may be.

  • Carissa says:

    Wow! I really need to study this stuff. I to have met several people in my life I had an instant connection with. I have been “head over heals” in love with three people in my life. I have loved more people than that. But these three people I have had an extreme attraction to them. One was a five month or so relationship with my first lover. The second was my first husband (for two years) and another more recent guy I met five months ago. I have been married to a man for twenty-one years and have four children with him. While I did love him at one time, I never felt that kind of love or connection with him. I really thought I was not capable of that type of love again. I felt like part of me died when my first husband divorced me. I just thought that I could never trust and love that way again. I trust no one, not my husband, not my children, not my parents. No one. The guy I met five months ago I felt that connection as soon as he approached me and touched my arm. Almost like he had done it a million times before. We were getting to know one another, and I was being completely honest as I wanted him to know everything about me. As I felt like if we were to be together I needed to know he loved the real me. Not who I would pretend to be to attract him. Of course that did not work out real well. To much to fast. Before it got to far, he decided that he was looking for someone different, someone younger. I am forty four. He is fifty three. I guess nine years younger is not young enough. But even knowing so many bad things about him. I am still head over heels in love with him. I would drive past his house to see if he was home, and believe me it was not on my way to anything! I think about him constantly. I have other opportunities, one in particular with a guy that I used to work with that seems like a very nice guy, just no connection. I told the man that I was disappointed because I trusted him (why I don’t know). He did say that I should have trusted him. He said he could have used me for sex, and to have a good time until he found something better. But he would not do me that way. I really felt like he felt the connection as well, but I was just not the type of person he was looking for at this point in his life. He wants someone that will give him two sons. I would have, or died trying. Ugh! At least I know that I can feel that connection again. I just need to look for it again. Though it has never worked out in the past. What should I work on first? I know I really need to fix myself first. Then when that connection comes again I will be ready. Sad to say, but if this connection was because of previous life experiences it helps to know that maybe in the future I can meet up with “him” again and it will be the right time for us to truly connect for a life long relationship. I just hope that somehow I can remember all this love I have for him now and I can know it was not in vain. Thank you for your incite. It might make letting go for now a little easier.

  • jamie wooder says:

    great article, sums up the over romanticizing peeps, fall into, only too well( I know I did, because of the moments of profound beauty I touched in myself and being overwhelmed by the pre existing love bond) the soul connection from heaven, was very brief, before, on an energetic level, it was clear, she was the soul connection from hell, still karma was settled, I nearly lost my job etc, but leaving my dance group was the wisest move

  • Lisa says:

    I am having issues with this and spirituality. I see how much biology, testerone/hormones and evolution plays in why men cheat, are attracted to every woman in a physical way/in their brain to check women out, can be more violent..why woman show off their bodies especially during ovulation..most of it is instinct..animal instinct and that is fighting with the more evolved side of the brain. That is why they say men need a lot of variety and sex and are able to have sex without any attachment and at times it can be difficult for a woman to do the same. I know this doesn’t apply to everything but any thoughts on this. I see everyday in life how this plays out and it being the truth. Thanks.

  • Jamie Wooder says:

    @lisa, seems a bit of narrow view of the way men, work, not all work on the level of biology alone, some men are actually 3 dimensional

    pretty women are like buses, everywhere, most men are actually looking for something a bit more substansial than just phsicality, but myabe the model of romantic relationships is just showing how outdated it is over and over again

  • Jamie Wooder says:

    and although I would agree pretty much with everything Rosie has said as it resonates, I do think there can be attractions that can be explosive and growth filled, that are joyous but also have the compliemtary degree of opposites on an energetic level

    I dont always think, there is simply a very strong attraction just between opposites because of energetics,although have experienced, it, there can be more harmonious contrasts too, that are more than just being comfortable kinda thing

  • Jamie Wooder says:

    I also found Steve Gunn helpful, he went through a soul connection himself, and wrote a book about, it called When two souls connect, the first 10 articles in his article index really helped me around 2 years ago when I felt like I was going nuts with the impact of the past life connection

  • Callie says:

    This was an interesting read. With most of the people I am close to, there was an initial “click” of recognition when we met – where we just instantly “got” each other without having to explain a lot, even with people who are vastly different from one another. I currently have a relationship in my life that has left me pondering the “why?” of people we choose to interact with. During the past year, I found myself serving as a mentor to a student in my school who was going through a lot of problems in his senior year that threatened his graduation. We came to be very good friends, despite our differences in age, gender and backgrounds. We remain friends after his graduation, still email regularly and meet for coffee occasionally, even though I am sure there are some who look at this as something odd. I am able to see a lot of myself at his age when I look at him, and offer him some straight up advice and nudges in direction that I know he finds useful. He is able to show me that pursuing a dream is always good, that keeping on and persevering in the face of sometimes overwhelming problems and obstacles – even self-made ones – is something we should always maintain, even with the inevitable disappointments and resulting cynicism that come with age. I am 53 and he is 18. There is nothing romantic about our relationship, even though I am sure I might have considered it had we been the same age. But then we both would have missed out on a real opportunity for growth and learning, and I would have had far less to offer. For myself, I have learned to be more patient, less judgmental and more inclined to look at the important reasons that drive people to take what on first glance seem to be inexplicable actions. He was stuck in a pattern of self-sabotage that he is now learning to recognize and break. He has experienced success through perseverance. His graduation day was one of those top moments in my life – much more profound than my own or that of my children, oddly enough. I felt like I had fulfilled something important and significant in my life, and reading this article, perhaps I had. My own teenage son was concerned about this relationship for a while – “are you going to be one of those teachers who runs off with her student?” he asked me – but I think he now sees that this it is ok and on the up-and-up. Its intensity is what has surprised me. The ferocity with which I fought for him to succeed led me at times to question my motives. Was there something wrong behind my devotion to him and his success? Was this healthy? But on graduation day it all seemed to make sense. I had a feeling of peace, serenity and profound happiness for him and his family that was quite new to me. Watching him continue to grow and develop is a great privilege, one that I hope I will be able to maintain. I know we have both received much from the interaction, and I am grateful that it is not clouded by any romantic tangles. Age and circumstance were a built-in barrier to that. If we did set things up like that on the soul level, good for us, because it worked!

    • Wow Callie, what a beautiful story! This sounds like it is a wonderful relationship. :)

      Yes, things don’t necessarily need to be sexual or romantic when there is a strong soul-level connection. Sometimes before incarnating we decide to be lovers in this lifetime, but sometimes we decide to just be friends, or to have a teacher/student type of relationship where one mentors and supports the other. If you had this kind of agreement with him at soul-level, then your commitment makes complete sense indeed.

      Thanks for sharing, I loved to read this beautiful story.



  • lily says:

    hey, i wanted to ask you, a man and I have been attracting each other, and it’s like we are both in love with each other. Many times we walked away from each other only to find our way back. We do not talk often, but when we do meet, there is a good sense of closeness and when we make love, we both feel a connection. Could we be each other’s soul mate?

    I’m glad i found your article.

  • AriesSun says:

    I have been pondering why I am attracted to certain people lately and found your article. Thank you. I always forget about the more spiritual side of things, and an article like this brings me home. My story is simple, kind of, and I’m trying to figure out what it is bringing into my life or the life of another. He lives on the beach, he’s over 10 years younger, he’s everything I don’t want, but everything I enjoy in a person, but am also frustrated by. The connection is there, but I’m trying to pass it off as just sexual connection. I trust him and I don’t know why. I want to be with him and I don’t know why. He’s too young for me. He won’t understand me or my lifestyle and he will get too attached. But I want to make him happy, and I don’t know why. I don’t even know if I’m attracted to him physically. He lives 7 hours away and I can drive to visit him and want to make plans to, but haven’t. We talk every day. But why? I’m guessing we have a deeper connection than I am willing to admit to myself? Anyway, that’s my story. Thanks for posting this!

    • Hi AriesSun,

      That’s one mysterious connection! :) It sounds like you have a lot you can learn in this relationship. Especially about yourself.

      Thanks for sharing your story. Relationships can be so interesting!

      Oh yeah, and the spiritual side of things frequently explains a lot. There are some relationships in my life that used to seem so irrational… before I understood what was really going on!



  • Jennifer Williams says:

    I was wondering. My husband, just left me like two-two and a half weeks ago, I am guessing. I was devastated..traumatized even (though, I did not know it at the time, of course. I would forget, no know what was going on. He had me look up something. I realized what was going on with me. When I read the description of Trauma.) anyways. Right after he said it was over. He turned around and got on Skype, talking to a girl he knew. He then, realized he had feelings for her, after being on conference calls with other friends of his. They were talking about how happy he sounded, etc. Skip ahead, I ask him if he loves her, he tells me he does. Skip ahead to lastnight. She was talking about how she remembers fairly vividly her past lives. She was talking to him, about people she knew. He started to remember..himself. I know, though he did not tell me. But, the way he has been talking. He thinks she is his soulmate. How am I suppose to compete with that? Really? — I was thinking it could just be the connection, the strong bond they have from sharing a pastlife or pastlives. Is there a chance? A chance he is getting confused, because of the happiness she brings him, and the strong connection they have..that he is confusing it with love?

    We have been togeather for 7years, we have a child togeather. I know he was not cheating on me beforehand. Nor, broke up with me to be with her. So, that is not the case. Though, it may seem like what has happened, with how FAST things have progressing. That is not the case.

    Any advice for me? Anything that you can help with, would be a big help. Him and I still live together, he spends all of his time talking to her. It seems as if he is obsessed with her, though he tells me it is not like that. He actually, talked to me for an hour..today. Instead, of getting up going to hide talking to her until he goes to bed.

    • Hi Jennifer,

      I am very sorry to hear this. I can image how tough that must be on you. Please feel hugged!

      It’s impossible to tell based on just on your story what’s going on between him and her. Yes, it is possible that they have a strong soul-level connection and that he confuses it with being in love with her. There could also be something unhealthy going on. Or they could simply have some unfinished business to solve. I cannot tell. He is the one who would need a reading to find this out, but he’s not the one we’re talking about, you are. :)

      Since his choices are beyond your control, my advice would be to focus on yourself rather than on him. I understand you are concerned with what is going on between him and her, but I would advise you focus away from him and more on you. For example, you could get some support, professional if necessary. You could do all the healing you can on yourself, and take excellent care of yourself. I also suggest you make choices based on what you want, not based on what is happening with him. You can’t control what choices he makes, but you can make sure you are happy – and you can be happy without him if necessary!

      Relationships can be tough… But they make us grow a lot. I like to remember that we are all here to support each other on our path. Maybe you can support him while he is going through this and when he has it figured out, if you can forgive him, you’ll be back together. Maybe you’ll have to let him go. Maybe you would even be better off letting him go. Who knows? :) What I see here is that this is a great opportunity for you to deepen your self-love and take care of yourself, of your path, your life.

      You could find out what’s going on between him and YOU, but I recommend you stop focusing on what’s going on between him and her, and bring your awareness back to yourself. After all, everything that happens in your life is about you. :)

      I’m sending you lots of love and encouragement on your path, and I trust that you will come out of this challenge even stronger and peaceful than before.



  • arati says:

    thanks for such a nice explaination of attraction. i always used to think that attraction is only physical,but recently when i got attracted to a person i meet occasionaly and i also realize that he is also attracted to me.i was disturbed because i am married 9 yrs ago and i couldnt even imagine that someone could get attracted to me and i never intended to do so. but now i can understand that its a relationship where i have a problem and he has the answer so u shaped my thoughts and cleared confusions.thanx again.

    • You are very welcome. :)

      I believe attraction can happen at so many levels. It can be sexual chemistry but it can also be an emotional thing, an intellectual affinity, or a spiritual bond. It can take so many forms and have so many reasons! It’s a fascinating topic.

      I wish you all the best and that you find a beautiful solution to your problem. :)



  • Caroline Greenlaw says:

    Wow this makes so much sense, I met a man I went to school with 20 years ago! I was drawn to him like a magnet, in all honesty it’s the first time I have been really drawn to anyone, I was married for 20 years and and never really felt love or being in love with anyone, except my children, it turned out that the man I met has borderline personality dis, his emotions are intense and often painful, he had never sought help for it and he was trying to deal with some really difficult issues, he was at times a night mare, he is now getting help which is great, everyone tells me to leave him alone he is bad news, but they just see the bad! I see the truly beautiful person that he is, we broke up several times, mostly due to me, I feel pressured and stressed by his neediness, I talked to a councillor following the break up because this relationship was really a defining moment for me, I learnt so much about myself that’s it left me flabbergasted! I discovered that I have probably got avoidant personality disorder and until this relationship I lived in a very superficial 2 diamentional world we are still very close and sexually attracted to one another, the sad thing is that in my 43 years of live I’ve learnt that my emotions are very muted, I guess that in this relationship we both admired some of the qualities the other has, which has helped to show us both the way!

  • Lee says:

    I’m just curious of your view on lust/sexual physical attraction..it can happen so much (even in committed relationship) you think of other people…is this purely biological which I have read and they’ve done studies on the brain. It also shows that most men are capable of having sex without love and still be in love with their spouses with how their brains are hormonally made up. I wondered how you handle this. I believe that is why there are open relationships you are seeing more and more, dating plural at once..because you can connect with so many people in just a physical way but how do you not let that hurt you in another way?

    There was a cop I met and there was an instant attraction (I think it was physical at first/lust for him and for me..but there was something else I felt there as I think he did) but what was painful was he was married and I would never do anything to jeopordize that and neither would he. I could pick up though that he was thinking of me in a sexual/lust way which is a normal response that we all have with people we view as attractive but also that there are things going on in his marriage. The entire thing is very painful. I do pray for him to be protected on the job because he is a man of integrity, moral strength and character, and a family man..dedicated. I just feel so guilty. Any advice..

  • Chandan says:

    I have been searching for something of this sort for quite some times. I have been facing similar kind of attraction with a girl. I am married and well placed, she is in a relationship and highly intellectual, From the day one we met, we never met face to face, still she seems to know everything about me. She has soo much authority over me, and we are mad behind each other. It is not only love, its not sexual attraction at all. I mean there is something strange between me and her that i cant understand. I mean i have no great reason to love her so much and absolutely she is also too good placed and from a too good family to have loved me. Infact we share some undefined mystic relationship, which i dont have any answer of. Is it past life relationship? I mean i am not able to understand what it is? Again we have never met face to face, we are not from the same city even, and we also dont share same work field. What is it??

  • Mana says:

    This is such a beautiful re-minder of exactly what I probably needed to hear. You are right, there are some negative connections and energy pulls, and yet there are also those relationships that should not always be branded into the romantic slots, each has a purpose, and in today’s day and age, when love and intimacy are so scare and so starved for, any deep connection directly jumps the gun to a romantic liaison, which is so often not the case. It teaches us to retreat back from dumping our soul energies onto someone and push them against soul contracts they may have with other souls in this lifetime, as much as that might pinch or hurt us. Teaches us the need to expand the heart and flow and let others flow, instead of tying them down just for us. Difficult, but to be achieved. Thank you for your post.

  • Greetings Rosine,

    I am very glad to have stumbled across your site and I find it…calming.
    Never considered “soul-level connection” concepts until last fall when I began to notice something I could not define in a co-worker. A sense of a glow, an energy, and even a time-slowing sensation in her presence…
    I guess the first thing that happened was a statement that came from out of the blue last summer. A slow workday at a busy retail establishment and I walked obliviously past our new cashier and she said, “There’s something about you ____” I stopped for a second and likely made a comment along the lines of “these crazy kids today” and I walked on and went back to my own business, not really thinking about what a odd thing to say that was…
    Well that is an odd thing to say
    to a co-worker, no?

    Not long after this, she got into a bad, bad DUI accident
    Destroyed car, alcohol level over 2… bad.
    Because she was renting a room in the same town
    that I live in, I ended up giving her rides to and from
    work when our schedules co-incided.
    So we talked and smoked cigs on our 15 min
    commutes… talk was easy, funny banter etc
    Learned a lot about this kid
    I always seem to be able to get folks to open up…
    She did a lot of really “different” things in life
    at a young age and many things that would make any parent pull out their hair… HS exchange student as a JR
    to a Balkan country… ran off with a teacher for a week to
    NYC from far away when she was too young… did something or
    other in the Pacific NW that I didn’t quite get…
    ran a dog walking business
    in NY before she bounced in here…
    Different kind of kid to be sure…
    So maybe the third time I gave her a ride, I said to her
    “you have a glow about you” because I could sense a radiant energy to my right in the car.
    I said it without any ulterior motives and said it
    as if we could have been talking about the weather…and I have never said anything like that to anyone before. She was not taken aback and took it in stride…

    I think that is the jumping off point of this soul/energy
    connection for me and as I currently view it -since we work together
    I notice it a lot. Her’s probably is a combination type of light and dark
    and the general sense I am left with is “Shit, I really really really want this kid
    to win and have a good life, because the light is there
    but sometimes I think she’s trying to snuff it/herself out
    via self-destruction, self-sabotage and a general Lone Wolf attitude.”

    There is a 20 year age difference between us and I am married with kids. I have no goal of a relationship beyond what it is now but I feel a deep need to see her succeed that I cannot rationally explain. I even told her in a letter that if I had a daughter (I have two boys) I would want her to be just like her, troubles and all.
    The almost overwhelming light/energy and time slowing in her presence rolls on unabated and I am better prepared to mesh with it after reading your offerings on soul-level connections so THANK YOU!!!

    I have even gone back into memories and sorted out others, both male and female, from my life who “present/presented” light/energy to me – have even exchanged lengthy correspondence with one who told me that others have spoken to her of a light she has.

    I am intruiged by this all… it feels like the first steps of a journey.

  • Nana says:

    i have just read your article , i was searching because I was thinking of the reason of why i am attracted to certain people , some people i don’t even need in my life, your article makes sense, one year ago i met this guy who is 23 years younger than me, and i have never since then think of this relationship as a romantic one at all, but still can’t imagine my life without him, it pains me a lot that i can not find the reason, and why is he very important?,because nothing special in him at all, what do you think?

  • Tammy Bolin says:

    I have always believed that people who have many talents like they play music by ear, can draw with no lessons, are very crafty, compared to those who don’t know anything at all, no common sense. I believe the talented ones have many past lives are old souls, and maybe the thing they seen to be so good at with little or no teaching is what they did in there past life. The ones with no common sense and cant seem to do anything this there first time here.

  • Cici says:

    I am a healer in nature and a good listener. I met a guy 26 years older than me (I am 38 and he is 64) who is divorced twice and has a lonely heart. Therefore, I felt so impulsive to hug him and comfort his wounded heart when he told me his past and his feeling about me even he knew I am married for 15 years. Now we both felt connected to each other at soul-level and fully understand we will only stay as friends because we both agreed our responsibility to out family is much more important than our feeling. Our feeling with each other is close, beautiful and at the spiritual level. However, I also felt emotionally cheating my husband for my feeling for this old guy. What should I do now?

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